Love of my Life

   Why? What a loaded question. Sometimes there is an answer and sometimes there really is no answer to our why questions. For me I am wondering why in the heck a long deployment is so overwhelming. WHen you really look at it,  it is just such a brief moment in time compared to the rest of life. But why on earth does the idea of it seem so hard? They are not gone forever and you still get to talk with the one you love. But yet the very idea of it makes me just deeply sad. Out of all the branches in the military my husband chose the safest. So why do I worry about him not coming home? To the point I am hyperventilating in the shower and just crying so many tears. I don't mind being alone and I have so much to keep track of right now I don't know how in the world I would keep up with my husband. And the more I get into school the more busy I will become. I won't know what to do with myself. And how on earth could one person captivate my heart and life so much that the absence of him seems like life is ending?
    One man has captivated my heart and unending attention. In the romance movies you see people falling in love, leaving all behind and following that person to end of the earth kind of passion. Like every girl I wanted that someone special to think I was something special. Being with Thomas makes me feel whole and complete. I had no idea on how much I was missing in my life. And by growing closer with God would reveal to me such a special heart. I guess I just need to tell you all about the wonderful man I got lucky enough to marry. Every time Thomas is gone I always tell him the one thing I miss the most is his laugh. Oh my goodness if you have ever been around Thomas long enough to hear him laugh.....you can't help but smile or laugh with him. It is such an infectious laugh. I never laugh as much or in the same way, than when I am with Thomas. His laughter reaches all the way to his eyes. His eyes say so much about him. Just by looking at his eyes I can tell if he is hurt or just sad. I could get lost forever in those eyes.  And he has that look. That look where you know he loves you more than life itself. It melts my heart every time. And he snacks more than any person I have ever been around. He is always munching on something. It is just trying to keep healthier choices of food in the house for him to munch on. With this knew diet I am on it has helped with that some. He eats more sweets than any person I know. And the fact that he is not a diabetic amazes me. He is a clean freak but so messy all at the same time. He believes with all his heart and has such a strong passion for the Lord. There are so many memories of him that I think about all the time.
The memory I love to think about is all the silly times we will be at home listening to music and he will come over to me, pull me up, and we will just start dancing all over the house. By the end of it I can hardly breath because I am laughing so much. And always he picks me up and twirls me around. I love having me a strong husband. I get all the piggy backs I never got growing up. :-) But when the day is done and all the madness is over we get to be home together. When we were dating the hardest part was seeing him leave to go to his house or go back to whereever he was at in the country at the time. We both couldn't wait to be married because at the end of the day we wouldn't have to say goodbye. We could say goodnight.
   If you couldn't tell already, I love my husband to pieces. I would give anything right now just to hear his voice. But what I am thankful for is we have the best glue keeping us together through all the craziness of life. From the time we started dating I called it God glue. He is what binds us together and keeps us together after all this time a part. And as we get closer to being a part for a while I know that God glue will keep us together. Take every moment captive. My husband and the memories we have already only after such a short time together are so sweet to my heart. I love you Thomas Childress. And nothing will ever change that. <3